Currently I am in full Christmas mode. I am working to get my Christmas projects made and my shopping done. I am trying to think of what homemade ornaments I can make this year to torture my family with. I am planning how to decorate the house and put up all the trees. Yes there is more than one.........shut up. I have baking to do, cards to make, cleaning to be done and I love all of it.
In spite of the fact that I totally love this holiday, in the past and for a good part of this year it has caused me a fair amount of angst. Each year I worry myself silly thinking we should be practical, we should be sensible, We need to keep the cost down. Dither, dither, fret, fret, fuss, fuss and more fuss. Well this year I have given my head a shake and made up my mind about a few things. What I can and should control (me) and what I should just let be ( what everyone else is doing).
One does have to be realistic here about gifts. Lets face it, your siblings, their off spring and your friends may love you to bits, but they are not going to spring for the flat surface self cleaning stove, the 350 watt kitchen aid mixer, the 32" flat screen tv or the diamond tennis bracelet you have been jonesing for. Those gifts are spouse/significant other gifts, not be expected from anyone else. If you are single, you get that sort of thing for yourself or not at all. I know as much as I wish I could be Mother Bountiful and buy everyone the big fancy things, its not gonna happen. When I win the lottery, then watch out Baby, the sky is the limit bit for now I have limits.
I know that I am at the stage in my life where the things I NEED are ether way too expensive for a family given gift or they are little things, consumable things. For example right now I what I need in life is a new scraper for the windows of my car, body wash, shampoo, a new sandwich maker, a couple of specific cd's , or a desk lamp for the sewing table, stuff like that. Gift cards are great for me. I can shop and I get stuff I need or would not buy normally. I can splurge without a second thought. Honestly I am tickled silly with most anything I am given. I don't give gifts with the expectation that I get something in return. I am not a terribly fussy picky person. REALLY I AM NOT :-)
I really, really, really like to give gifts. I always think, that's it, I am cutting down, but I don't. You really can't in some ways, things cost no matter what. I know what I can and cannot afford so why do I keep thinking I have to clamp down on myself? I have come to the conclusion that at Christmas I don't want to be stressing. I enjoy giving gifts and I love to hunt for things I think that my nearest and dearest will like. I love to make things and give them as gifts. Sometimes I am bang on and sometimes I am not but its ok, I have tried. I like doing it. It makes me happy and because it makes me happy I am no longer going to fret about it.
So my grand conclusion is that I am not going to fuss about it any more, I cannot and will not. I am just going to enjoy. I embrace the shopping and gift giving, I don't want to be concerned about being limited to a certain dollar amount or that's not enough, that's too much. That is not working for me and it was my idea. I was the one who thought this is how it should be. You would think I would know myself by now but I keep learning new things everyday. Mostly I am learning to go with what makes me feel good about me.
It Christmas time and its my chance to let the people I care about know that I am thinking of them. Life is to short to not be happy. I enjoy giving gifts, I am going to focus on that. Not to mention that I am not going to worry about what other people are thinking or doing. They are free to do as they please, I can only make rules for myself. This conclusion makes me feel so peaceful. I will give what I can, I will make the best choice I can for the recipient, it makes me happy to do this, end of story.
Oh yeah its all good!! Bring on Christmas, I am loving it !!!
Toodles, Linda
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