I'm Still Here

 I have been absent but I am still here. These last few months have not been the best but even I am tired of going on about it so, big girl pants firmly in place and lets look for the positive.

I finally got a flimsy sandwiched up and ready to quilt. First one this year and its already the end of MAY. I am shocked and appalled. Never mind its all ready to go and I will be back in my happy place soon enough. This one is a donation quilt. I have another donation flimsy ready and then two for me sitting in the project box. I still need to put the boarder on the Christmas quilt. I am joined up to do a fall quilt a long but so far all I have done on it is print out the patterns each week. I have not actually started construction.

I have been working away at knitting toques and scarves from, my excess yarn stash. I like to make them. then donate to the local Safe and Warm Shelter plus a charitable organization that helps people in need. Like all my projects this year I have had a slow start but I'm starting to hit my stride. Three hats and three scarves finished so far, Scarf number four on the needles.

The Banker is heading off on vacation next week and Teddy Bear has family coming to visit. I will need to fend for myself in the coming days. I may tackle my goal sooner than later.  I have been trying to talk myself into making a shopping trip to Shoppers Drug Mart, This may be the final push that I need to actually go. I'm going to be taking myself to No Cook this Friday. The Banker usually picks me up but she has another social commitment that night. 

This weekend I have a young fellow coming to clean up my yard. He is trying to earn enough to buy virtual reality glasses as his parents told him he has to earn the money on his own, The Banker will be with him to help supervise. I was going to have to hire someone to do it so I am very happy to help the young man out.

That is about it for news from me. 

Toodles Linda

                                                                                                             

 Well lets start this post with some positive things. I'm in a mood and this could disintegrate into a pity party quite quickly if I do not take care and watch myself. Its a slippery slope. 

 Lets see how this goes shall we??? 

For the very first time in months, I went to the store and picked up my own groceries. Not a big accomplishment in most peoples world but its a big deal in mine.

Not only did I go once but I went again the second day to a different store to get the things I could not get from the first store. Of course McDonald's breakfast was had the first trip but I did not repeat the performance on the second day. Too much of a good thing.  I cannot state how good this makes me feel. I can do this again, on my own, and I do not have to put upon my friends. A small bit of independence snatched back.

I did some knitting for a former co-worker, She had mitts that were her kids and wanted them fixed so her grandchildren  could use them. They look like little puppets and needed new mouths.

Everybody had holes and some had nearly no mouth at all. So I knit new inserts and sewed them up. They are good to go once again .

I always feel like I am channeling my Mom's mother when I do things like this. Little Grandma was always making do and mending. She was excellent at it, far better than I am but I like to think what little talent I have in this area came from her, through my mom.

I think my cellulitis is gone but I am on guard for any more flare ups. I just wish it would go away and stay gone. (ok here is the slippery slope). I am tired. I am tired of being sick every time I turn around. I am tired of trying to do the normal everyday things and everything hurts ALL THE TIME. I'm tired of taking handfuls of costly medicines that make me fatigued. I have no will to do the fun things I love to do because I am so freaking tired all the time. What little tiny ground I gained, before I go sick this last month is lost because I got sick again and walking was so painful. Back to square one I go with the physical fitness. Its so disheartening.

I will get through this, I'm not ready to throw the towel in just yet, its just at this moment I am frustrated. For someone who is so tired, my sleep pattern is all out of whack. I need to get that back on track.  Lack of sleep makes me cranky and I over react to the little things in life. Dropping something on the floor becomes a personal attack instead of an inconsequential incident that it is 

This too shall pass. My inner child is on the floor at the moment having a complete tantrum over how "IT'S NOT FAIR". She will wear out in time and things will get back on some sort of track. That is my story and I am sticking too it. 

Toodles, Linda